Friday, June 13, 2008

seeking clarity

ever find that the harder you search for it, the more elusive it becomes? clarity, that is. a consultant that i spoke with tonight encouraged me to take some time off to find the answers. it's funny, i'm struggling with the basics like "what are my strengths?" - reading that popular book by marcus buckingham on discovering them - "what do i enjoy doing most?," "what is the best use of my time and energy?" you know - basic things that should be answered easily. for some reason, i'm so immersed in my get up, check e-mail, go to the studio, handle to-dos, come home, go to bed, start all over, that i'm unable to hone in on bigger pictures. would time off allow me to figure these things out? what does time off really look like? what would i do? lord, i took good to great and ayn rand biography to ibizia for my 30th birthday and wondered why boys weren't approaching me on the beach! geeeezzzz. apparently, i'm not even sure how to do time off. i share this with you in case you, too, are struggling with the basics and wondering where the answers are. maybe we have to stop searching so hard for them, drink a little vino, dance a little, do our yoga, and trust that the answers will come.

cheers (picture me lifting a wine glass containing lilac hill with a bow tied around the stem)!

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Lynne from NY said...

Hi Kimberly!
I live near Rochester and the lilacs looked and smelled fabulous this year. That wine has to be good too. And it's in a cobalt blue bottle!

Taking just a day off and having "me" time might make all the difference to you. I just did it on Wednesday....walked my dog for almost an hour in cool morning, shopped at Macy's, nailed some outstanding bargains, had a delightful vegetarian lunch, read the NY Times, jotted ideas down on my pink pad of paper, re-energized with a desert of a skim cappuchino/vanilla sugar on top then on to the garden shops and bought some lovely flowers and herbs for my deck garden. It was one of those days where everything went right. All by myself! I find when I have a day like this every month, my thoughts become clearer, work becomes more bearable and it really breaks up the week. (and I take digital pix along the way of anything fun I want to remember). Do try it and then share, I'm sure we'd all enjoy!

I've been reading your blog a while now and your book was many good ideas!
Many thanks go out to you across the miles!!! L

Haley-O said...

I agree. Stop searching. Those aren't necessarily "THE questions," anyway. Besides, the answers to those questions change every day: today my strength is patience and containing my children; yesterday, those were my WEAKNESSES! ;)

I think our time is better spent DOING than SEARCHING, you know? Anyway, I find, when I'm doing things like yoga or walking, or painting (not that I have time for that anymore!), or journaling, the answers come -- like, when I'm not actively seeking them, you know?

I have no idea how to do time off either. I try it. But, it never lasts.... Yoga is time off for me. Focused time off.... CHEERS (I'm holding up a sippy cup....a Dora sippy cup....Picture that!) ;)

kristina rose said...

i agree with both of you. by giving yourself that one day a week or one day every two weeks keeps you sane and balanced. take that time to "waste a day" as i call it. doing whatever you want. i love to grocery shop and lollygag in hampden. it keeps me peaceful and gratuful with no questions to be asked and no answers to fret over.

lia said...

I agree. It is in not searching and allowing our selves to just be. But, then the anxiety can come, but what is underneath the anxiety? It's a process and I'm still not there.

Best wishes.

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The Skeptic Yogi said...

Okay, i left my corporate life-sucking job on feb 28th, and I've spent the last 3 months touring india, doing a yoga teacher training, then more yoga retreating here in cali, and now just enjoying life and pondering next steps. I am where you want to be....a gal with time off.

You are where I want to be...a gal with a mission, a passion and a place to be when she gets up every morning! you have purpose, indpendance, createive outlets, and community.

You've got it all girl! Just relish in it for a little while and stop looking at what you don't have! Life never promises clarity for any of us. I'm so much more relaxed, less stressed and I'm enjoying every moment of my "time off" but clarity?? Not so much. Really, what you're looking for is elusive..especially for people like us that constantly change, evolve and grow. If you had clairity today, surely something new and amazing would come up for you tomorrow, and suddenly your tastes, interests and attention would be diverted somewhere else anyway.

Learn to live with and enjoy the process without having to know or have all the peices in place.

And enjoy that wine too! Much like me, you're far too cerebral!!

Caren aka skepticyogi

chic gddss said...

Have you considered a brief trip to a far away place to help you gain perspective? I'm just back from fabulous Paris and highly recommend it. I stayed in the Marais ... the Dupont Circle of the city of light. Soooo worthwhile. Maybe a b'day gift to yourself?

Katie Goode said...

I find that if I take to much time off I start looking for things to do. I've started taking my dogs for a long walk in the mornings (they're little dogs so a long walk is 20-30 minutes). It gives me the feeling of having a vacation, without letting me start thinking to much.

Also, the more I try to focus on finding the answers, the more the distractions get in the way. Sometimes it helps to intentionally NOT think about something to get some clarity.


Textile Conservator's Manual said...

I just thought I should let you all know, in the forums I have started another Artist's Way HTC Yahoo Group that can be found here:

You should all join so we can read The Artist's Way and go through the process together, week by week, to revitalize our creative selves! It should be fun. If you ware interested, please sign up soon! I can't wait to get started!

vj said...

i tend to seek wisdom from fortune cookies (i even had one fortune saying etched on a ring--but i digress...)

here's another one of my fave's that applies (imho):

stop searching. happiness is right next to you!

kimberly wilson said...

thanks for ALL your grand insights. made me smile and ponder - two great things! this sunday's podcast sheds some interesting light on this dilemma and serves as a loving reminder to stay focused on the BIG picture. xo