Q: I share an office with a guy who really irritates me -- he's really loud on the phone, and somewhat abrasive, and it puts me on edge all day. I need to somehow make myself stronger or more immune to it, so I can still feel tranquil even when he's admitting non-tranquil vibes right next to me. I'd like to feel at home in my office, even with this person in the same room.
A: Oh darling, this IS a tricky one. Our home and offices are sanctuaries and when the tranquility is thwarted, it can make for an uncomfortable situation. A few thoughts: can you gingerly share with your untranquil co-worker that you'd be grateful if he kept his voice down during calls as you have trouble concentrating and don't want to be an eavesdropper. Showing him how keeping his voice down will also benefit him (you won't hear his convos) may provide incentive.
We're all unique. Some people like to write in a bustling cafe, I need total quiet and if you're like me, sharing an office probably lowers your productivity. You can present this to your manager and explain how this working situation is lowering your ability to function fully. This will help you speak his/her language as managers want a fully efficient team.
Observe your reaction to this person. Take a deep breath. Is it really him or is it your reaction to him? The challenge with life is that we can't control other people (shocking, I know), BUT we can control our reactions to them. Maybe he's been put in your path to help you grow in some way, become more accepting, or it's a really bad working scenario that you need to get switched asap.
Hang in there, see if you can address it directly with him. If that doesn't work, take action by addressing it with someone who can help you switch. Our work environment is VERY important. I devote a whole chapter in my upcoming book to Soulful Surroundings so I feel your pain as I know how important it is to have the optimum enviroment to be creative AND productive. Sending you lots of tranquility and courage to address the situation . . .
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